I hope you're enjoying Mothertalk so far as much as I am! This week we're discussing the second part, "No Notion of
What Was in Store for Me", where Mary talks about the circumstances around
her marriage to "Papa", Shigekiyo Kiyooka, and her subsequent
emigration from Japan to Canada. Other than telling us a bit about Papa, Mary
also includes anecdotes about other marriages she witnessed, namely those of
her own parents and Papa's, as well as the picture brides who were with her on
the boat to Canada.
It's interesting to me that Mary's husband had emigrated to
Canada several years before they married, and had already learned English and
acquired a taste for Western food. He seems to be Westernized in several ways,
yet he still returns to Japan to find a bride. Mary also mentions that he was
an eldest son, which means he would have been expected to stay in Japan to
carry on as head of the family after his father, and yet he chose to live in
Canada permanently. Mary, on the other hand, seems to place a lot of emphasis
on the samurai traditions of her upbringing, and by her own admission showed
little interest in leaving her hometown. They may both have been Japanese, and
from the same region, but how much did they really have in common?
Other things I'm thinking about:
What do you think of Mary's description of her brother? How
would you compare him to Mary's father and husband, and how might that have
affected her relationships with each of them?
How do you think the many years that have passed since Mary
first met her husband and thought about leaving Tosa for Japan might affect the
way she speaks about that time now? Also, how does it change the story to know
that Mary is telling it for her son to write?
What other parts of this section did you find interesting
and why?
I look forward to hearing what you think in the comments! Next week, I will summarize our discussion, and post questions for part 3.
-Carolyn
It feels like Mary lived by the samurai traditions more so than her brother, thus her father's special affections for her, her sadness at her brother selling the family swords, and her ability to be strong for the people (e.g. the picture bride running away from abusive man) who needed her to be. It was super interesting how Mary's father had a list of prerequisites for the man who would be his daughter's husband, and how "papa" (arguably) falls short or answers his prerequisites but in unexpected ways. I found his funny how he is more of the quiet, withdrawn, scholarly type, in contrast to Mary's lively, outgoing, and witty self. It's funny how fate works out, especially since we're looking back on an amazing and incredible life story, but what is even more amazing is the depth of love, particularly the love between Mary and her father.
ReplyDeleteYes, and it's ironic that since Mary is his daughter, his way of caring for her is to arrange a marriage for her that will take her abroad so she will have adventure, far away from him. If she was his son, she would have been the perfect successor for him in the ways of Iai, but her actual fate is pretty much the complete opposite of that. Still, I agree with you that she seems to find other ways of carrying on the samurai code. I wonder how that applies to the rest of us - are we also living by codes passed down to us through our families, ones maybe not as formal as bushido? Or are we just making things up as we go along? Whose legacies are we continuing through our daily conduct? Maybe this ultimately has a bigger impact on the world than the preservation of specific training or art forms like Iai.
DeleteIt is interesting to think about the what was or was not included and resulted from the filters of her memory, a translator, her son's arrangements and then Marlatt's editing. Still, the bleakness of the pictures brides and the prevalence of drinking were eye-opening.
ReplyDeleteIt's true, I don't think we can accuse her or any of the other "authors" of romanticizing things...and we'll never know exactly what parts of the story were filtered or arranged by whom. But the bleak aspects of the story are always, for me, coloured by knowing that Mary is telling them only because she survived to live a long life beyond that. Is it affirming to think of how she was able to survive, or more haunting because of the lingering memories she carried with her for so many years?
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