Mothertalk, part 4: Keeping the Dream of Uniting the Family Alive

Another week, another section of Mothertalk! I've loved reading your comments on the book so far. We've had some interesting observations about how Mary, as a woman, still carried on the samurai spirit in her own way even while following a mostly typical life path for women at the time (marriage and children). People also seem to be enjoying Mary's different perspective on Japanese Canadian history, which doesn't gloss over the hardships or heartbreaks of her difficult life and marriage. This only gets more true as we read the next section, "Keeping the Dream of Uniting the Family Alive".

I find a lot of the stories in this section heartbreaking in small ways, ways that add up to show the bigger painful experiences of Mary's life. Mary talks more about how it felt to be separated from her two eldest children, George and Mariko, when she left them to be raised by their grandparents in Japan, and perhaps more painfully, how it felt when they finally were reunited as almost-strangers. We also hear some things about her younger children whom she raised in Canada, such as Harry and Roy's antics and injuries. Mary notes that the younger children have a bond from growing up together sharing beds in their small East Calgary house, and also from growing up "in a white man's world" (115). But I think it would be too simple to say that Mary was close to her younger children and alienated from George and Mariko: after all, at the time she told these stories, Mary was living with Mariko, and she talks about how George and Mariko are the only ones who understand her culture and also the only ones who speak her language in a meaningful way, since they were also raised in Japan. Moreover, George did join the family at age thirteen, and Mary brought her infant daughter Irene to Japan with her to visit Mariko for two years, from 1938 to 1940. In what ways do you think the Kiyookas like a tight-knit family? How are they not?

Other things I'm thinking about:

Mary tells more stories about women who became prostitutes in this section, including situations on both sides of the Pacific. Why do you think she tells so many different anecdotes related to prostitution? How does the story about the Japanese brothel compare to other stories Mary has told?

Another thread running through this section is Mary's memories of the political and economic conditions at the time: in particular, the Great Depression and the fallout with the Chinese Canadian community after Japanese aggression in Manchuria. How do Mary's allusions to these events as parts of her life relate to your previous knowledge and ways of thinking about them as history? Do they seem interconnected with the other stories in this section, or merely incidental?

What other parts of this section did you find interesting and why?

Next week is part 5, when we learn about the Kiyookas' life during the period of Japanese Canadian internment. It'll be a fascinating discussion, and I hope you'll join us again! I'll also be announcing the next Nikkei book club pick for April/May...stay tuned!

-Carolyn

Mothertalk, part 3: All Caught Up in Our Canadian Lives

In the third section, "All Caught Up in Our Canadian Lives", we learn about the early years of Mary's marriage, including the birth of her first two children, George and Mariko, and her two-year visit back to her family in Japan. Mary also shares stories about women she knew who had affairs or dabbled in prostitution to help make ends meet, a practice she says was ordinary in the circumstances. What leaps out at me from these disparate stories is the restrictions that women of Mary's generation lived their lives under, and the kinds of lives they had to lead. What would have happened if Mary had chosen to leave her marriage, either by following Japanese divorce customs by returning to her father's family, running away with the Osaka man, or with the help of a samurai nuptial sword? Would either of the first two options have yielded her a happier life? And what does her choice to stay with her husband say about her? Is it a sign of her character as an individual in some way, or of the strength of her culture's influence on her - because a Meiji man and woman, even in Canada, marry for keeps?

Other things I'm thinking about:

There have been a few rather violent stories scattered throughout the book so far. What does this say about the world Mary lived in? Do you think these stories are extraordinary? Does Mary imply some kind of moral from them?

Mary says she never learned much English, but enough to be able to speak her mind. In fact, this book is a translation from her own original words, but one written by her son in a way that tried to mimick her voice. How would this story be different if we were reading it in Japanese? Is it easy to forget that the text is a translation?

What other parts of this section did you find interesting and why?

Be sure to check back next week for some discussion on part 4!

-Carolyn

Mothertalk, part 2: No Notion of What Was in Store for Me

I hope you're enjoying Mothertalk so far as much as I am! This week we're discussing the second part, "No Notion of What Was in Store for Me", where Mary talks about the circumstances around her marriage to "Papa", Shigekiyo Kiyooka, and her subsequent emigration from Japan to Canada. Other than telling us a bit about Papa, Mary also includes anecdotes about other marriages she witnessed, namely those of her own parents and Papa's, as well as the picture brides who were with her on the boat to Canada.

It's interesting to me that Mary's husband had emigrated to Canada several years before they married, and had already learned English and acquired a taste for Western food. He seems to be Westernized in several ways, yet he still returns to Japan to find a bride. Mary also mentions that he was an eldest son, which means he would have been expected to stay in Japan to carry on as head of the family after his father, and yet he chose to live in Canada permanently. Mary, on the other hand, seems to place a lot of emphasis on the samurai traditions of her upbringing, and by her own admission showed little interest in leaving her hometown. They may both have been Japanese, and from the same region, but how much did they really have in common?

Other things I'm thinking about:

What do you think of Mary's description of her brother? How would you compare him to Mary's father and husband, and how might that have affected her relationships with each of them?

How do you think the many years that have passed since Mary first met her husband and thought about leaving Tosa for Japan might affect the way she speaks about that time now? Also, how does it change the story to know that Mary is telling it for her son to write?

What other parts of this section did you find interesting and why?

I look forward to hearing what you think in the comments! Next week, I will summarize our discussion, and post questions for part 3.

-Carolyn

Mothertalk, part 1: My Heart's True Country

Welcome to the very first instalment of the Nikkei National Museum and Cultural Centre's Nikkei book club! We'll be reading and discussing Mothertalk: Life Stories of Mary Kiyoshi Kiyooka, by Roy Kiyooka in February and March. You can join the conversation by commenting on these blog posts, and also on Facebook and Twitter, where I'll be posting condensed discussion topics. We'll also be hosting an in-person discussion on April 2 at 2pm. Mothertalk is available in the museum shop, or find it online or at your favourite bookstore.

This first section of the book contains Mary's memories of Japan, where she grew up in the remote Kochi prefecture in the Meiji era, a daughter of the samurai class. Although her father was a well-respected Iai master, under the new system of government in Japan he was no longer employed, and so the family was poor.

On Facebook and Twitter, I asked what people thought about how Mary's samurai family background affected her relationship to Japan and Japanese culture. Since Mary's brother wasn't very strong, her father in many ways raised and educated her as a son, training her in the bushido code of values. But Mary went on to live a very different life, emigrating with her non-samurai husband to Canada, where the class system was very different. Mary also talks about the connections she has maintained to Japan throughout her life in Canada, including stories from her many trips back to visit. She says that she, like many issei (immigrant generation), would like to return to Japan, and that her home will always be Tosa. Is this surprising to you, given that she has lived almost her entire adult life in Canada, or not? Why? Do you think she would feel the same way if her childhood or her family's position had been different in some ways?

A couple other things I am thinking about:

Mary says she is not too sure how class works in Canada, where the distinctions are not as rigidly defined as in Japan. What would you tell her?

What do you think of the story of the one-eyed woman who became a Christian? How does it shape your understanding of Mary's life and values?

What other parts of this section did you find interesting and why?

Please respond in the comments below! Next week, I will summarize our discussion, and post some questions for part 2. Stay tuned!

-Carolyn